While every force available in the world is searching for the 5 people in the oceangate submersible, a boat filled with mostly Syrian and Pakistani refugees sank under still “unknown” circumstances off the coast of Peloponnisos, Greece (with the coast guard present). More than 600 people drowned but guess which of the two is making headlines
I will never get over how weird it feels to have tragic and emotional chapters of your life where you just also still go to work, and the grocery store, and see funny videos online all while feeling such paralyzing fear and heartache
So much of Beau is Afraid is representative of the way in which prolonged childhood trauma creates a gap between your internal and external self. This movie is set within that gap and displays this jagged distorted image of Beau’s reality. Beau isn’t sure what’s real or fake because he has absolutely no litmus test with which he can determine reality. Not only in the context of “what is actually happening”, but also in the context of “how does he feel about it?” and “how does Beau fit into any of it?” - y’know?
It’s such an interesting approach to the dissociation of the self, while also having to EXPERIENCE the self. The confusion it causes, the sense of being adrift, the desire to be guided but also the absolute uncompromising resistance to it.
Beau trusts no one, but trusts himself the least. Only he knows his own lived experience, and he’s defensive of it when challenged, but without a challenge he’ll fold like a wet paper bag because he’s heard endlessly about how wrong he is. He is CONSTANTLY asking for direction and validation, but cannot trust it once he receives it, either because people don’t know his true face, or because once they know his true face they are capable of manipulating him with it. Nobody understands his intentions or motivations, least of all himself! If something happens, it is both his fault for being a terrible person, and not his fault because everyone is misunderstanding him! Absolutely nothing is concrete except for the fact that his mother has micromanaged his life and lied to him, yet he loves and depends on her.
